Revenge Posted by gingersoaplovin , Jun 17, 2011 at 1:47 PM, in Labels: Epiphanys

Since yesterday, all I can think about is getting revenge.  I want to save all of those animals, most of which probably have distemper, thanks to the shelter not doing anything about Barley having distemper.  I honestly want to remove those animals from that shelter, then burn it down.  I want to find the person who previously owned her, torture them, and leave them in the same pain they put her in.  The same suffering.  Can you give a human distemper?? 

But to what end will I go to get revenge?  And would the means justify the ends?  Would doing these things to these people really be able to console me?  I don't think anything could, at this point...  I mean, if it could not fix how I feel, then what would really be the point?  It would not bring Barley back, for me.  And in a sense, is that what I'd be trying to do.  And would doing those things even be enough to justify her death?  I don't know the answer to these questions...

I honestly am just depressed, and my depression is making me angry.  I think.  Or maybe it is thinking about, "who would DO those things to an innocent animal?  to a baby?" It makes me so angry, every time I picture her lifeless little body being laid on that table, ever-so-gently.  It pisses me off when I have to see that image in my head, over and over again.  And I can't stop dreaming about her.  My Barley.